How I transitioned from living with fear and anxiety to living an inspired life

Hello my friends!

I feel like the weeks and days are moving along so fast. This is because I am in-line with my purpose now. Each day used to go by so slow. I would count the hours until lunch, then bedtime, or until I was done with my day of work. Then, each night, I would lay in bed with anxiety hoping the night would last a year. The mornings always came too soon and I would have to repeat to myself that it’s going to be ok and that this won’t be forever. I told myself that I will be happy and inspired again. Has this ever happened to you?  Have you felt uninspired in your life?

What has always excited you? It may be an idea you have kept close to yourself. Maybe you are scared to say it out loud because someone may hear you. Maybe being judged is just too much for you to bare and you decided you are just not good enough for it. This was the case for me and I decided I would hide all my true deep desires inside.

I decided I would try and fade into the background since that was more comfortable for me. I decided that my light was too bright for the world. My silliness was too silly and my ideas were so different from everyone around me. Wow, how wrong I was to try and constrain myself. Imagine an almost 6’ girl (in heels) trying to fade out into the background. I did speak loudly with my choice of clothes and my height. I was ok with that part. It was the deeper more authentic part of me I was most uncomfortable with.

I tried so hard to hide all of my unique abilities. I buried myself in mother hood, marriage and my career and just kept it cool.  My worst fear was being judged so I would shove it down. I was so uncomfortable with myself and I would tell myself I was not worthy enough to be me. I would go through this almost daily. I was working in an industry where balance did not have a place. The fashion world for me was all about working hard, while wearing high heels and looking like everything was perfect.  It was all smoke and mirrors and I was the best at that game.

Then something life changing happened to me that I never imagined would.

I became ill. I became so ill that I lost most of my vision and my fingers were in pain and inflamed. It felt as though someone took a sledge hammer to my hands. It hurt so bad to move them. My feet felt like I was walking on pins and needles and I could barely walk. This was all during fashion week, one of my busiest times of year.  I did what I did best and that was to shove it all down and slap a smile on my face. I went to work while this was happening because I had to be there.

I had to show up and work my biggest account. I needed to show I had it all together and there were no issues. I went to my meeting and presented the new Spring collections. I had concentrated so deeply that if felt like my eyes were bulging out of my face. If that was not crazy enough, I had my husband come and pick me up afterward and bring me to my neurologist appointment to figure out what was going on with me.

I had a scheduled spinal tap that day. Does anyone know what that is? If you are scared of needles this was the mother of all needles. It’s a very long needle, the length of your back.  The Doctor inserted it into my spinal cord to pull fluid out to test.  I held my husband’s hand as the procedure was done. I was laying on my side thinking I have to get back to work and make sure my brands did not know what I was going through. A few days later I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and told that I had an attack on my brain. This hit me like a ton of bricks. I was in shock and my first thought was what I am going to do with my business?  How can I hide this from my industry?  If I am sick they would fire me and I would loose my business. Then I had a rational thought. What is happening to my body and did I cause this?

I had to change my life and I knew it. I decided nothing bad will live in my body. I no longer wanted to live stressed out in a fast forward pace of life. I hired my girlfriend to help me with my business so I could take it down a notch. This did not work since like I said earlier there is no balance in the fashion industry.  Three years went by after this incident.  I was barely hanging on by a thread.  During this three years  I was also diagnosed with RA then Lupus. It was obvious Doctors were trying to put a name on my symptoms but had no idea what was really going on.  I was tired, I had inflammation, anxiety and had no more inspiration in my life. I was done and I wanted to crawl under a rock and stay there forever.

I then did something massive last May. I stepped outside my head and listened to my heart and it said ENOUGH!! I fired my employees, I fired my brands, I quit the business and closed my showroom. I sat with myself that day on the ground in my living room after it was all finalized. I never felt so free or so crazy before.

I was so scared to show the world my true light. But it came down to a very black and white choice. It was either my health declining more or becoming the healthiest and happiest version of myself. I chose my happiness and health and I knew in that moment I have never been more alive and more scared.

I had always eaten healthy, worked out, slept 8 hours a night and I still got ill. I was not living my true purpose. I was not connected to my heart and I did not allow myself to be my true self. I am happy to say I am almost 100 % percent symptom free now. I do not have any autoimmune disease in my body. I became ill because my body could not take any more stress.

I am here today to help you find your way of living an Inspired life.  Here  is a guide to my top 8 tips on what has changed my life and now I am living my happiest and healthiest self.  Since we are in the month of love I am also sharing my Spa Recipe! Let this be a month of self-love!!

A GUIDE TO LIVING AN INSPIRED LIFE

 1.The first step is to get out of your head!  Start thinking from your heart and less with your head. In our hearts is where we hear our true voice. Our heads will tell us we can’t do it and the self-doubt creeps in. This voice will trick you into an illusion that you are not enough. It will always be there and it’s up to you to tune it in or tune it out. To tune it out go back to your heart. Repeat this as many times as necessary. Breathe.

2. Meditation– Find a time in your day – morning and evening are the best times. Set aside 5-20 min. You can decide on how much time you want to dedicate – it is all ok. In the mornings I practice a simple 5-10 min meditation. I like the simplicity of headspace. I use Unplugged Meditation.  Then Jason Stephenson is my go-to for the evening. Jason is incredible and you can find him on YouTube. He puts me to sleep most nights.  I get into bed and grab my headphones, rub some lavender essential oil under my nose and fall asleep to his relaxing voice.

Meditation is personal and different for everyone. Try out different types of meditation and see what works for you.  It helps us to get out of our heads and calms down our system. By calming down our brain, important things like hormones, thyroid, adrenals and cortisol will also calm down. It gives our bodies a chance to heal. We can’t live in that flight of fight mode for too long or we can fall into getting ill like I did. If you can commit to just 5 min a day I promise you will start to crave it!  Soon you will find peace, and serenity in it. This is where the best inspiration comes from.

Quick tip – Refresh yourself in 5 breathes- If you run on adrenaline like myself it’s good to take a time out for a few moments. I like to use essential oils and I carry them in my purse. Rub some into the palm of your hand and take 5 big deep breaths in and out.  Run into the bathroom and if you are around people or just trying to escape from your kids or life!

3. Journaling- Write it all out on paper! Write out all of your deepest desires or anything you need to get off your chest. Get clear on what you want. You will learn more about yourself in the process. You may be surprised at how much you have been holding yourself back and how much inspiration was in you all along. There is a must-read book called The Artist Way by Julia Cameron. “Without the artist way, there would have been no Eat, Pray, Love- “Elizabeth Gilbert”

4. Make a vision board– grab a poster board, glue, scissors, and some old magazines. Do this alone, with your kids or you could make a girl party out of it. Cut out anything that inspires you – colors, activities, sayings, words, a place you are dreaming of, etc. Put it where you can see it daily. I hang mine around my office and look at it when I am working or getting ready for my day. I promise, it will give you so much inspiration! The energy and vision you put out in the world will start coming for you! It’s the law of attraction. Everyone I speak with who has done a vision board loves to boast about all the cool things that are coming into fruition. It will start to manifest and find its way into your life.  I had traveling on mine and I am going to India this month, and Hawaii in May (which I had pics of Hawaii). It’s so exciting! Do it!

5. Surround yourself with like-minded people– For me I have been surrounding myself with like-minded women. I just started a women’s wellness group and it has grown into something big. Do you know what happens when like-minded women get together? Its magic! I instantly feel inspired and alive and that feeling will stay with me for days and weeks.

If having a group is not your thing that’s ok. Make a commitment and meet up once a week or twice a month with another girlfriend. I meet up with a few friends that help keep me on track. We meet for tea or a walk and talk on the beach. It’s a good outlet for you.  Having the support of other women is powerful!  It’s not easy to do alone and having support will double your chances of succeeding. Plus you will be happier.

6.Say NO- Start to say no more to invites, outings, dates, etc. This has been one of the toughest lessons for me. I find most women struggle with this. This is because most of us ladies believe we have to be super-women! This is an illusion we have created for ourselves. To be the happiest versions of ourselves is not to say yes to everything but to say no. It’s about leaving room for what is most important for us. What is important to you?  Maybe it’s family, friends, quiet time, etc. Next time you are asked to do something, check in with how you feel. If it feels heavy and uneasy say NO! If it feels light and airy say YES! Don’t feel bad if you say no, it’s powerful and you are worth it! I say no more these days than yes. It’s freeing. Do it!

7. Self-care– It is so important to have alone time. If the time permits I recommend to have one day a week that is all about you. If this much time does not fit into your schedule, it’s ok. Make time even if you don’t have it. I go to the spa 1-2 a week to use the spa services. I sit in an infrared sauna. It helps take away my stress, anxiety and sweating out toxins and metals. I get massages as much as I can about 1-2 a month. I like to have a date with myself and head over to my favorite lunch spot and indulge a bit, or see a movie alone. Maybe go to the beach and sit and relax. Or if you only have 5 min for yourself, do my spa morning routine. Bring the spa to you!

SPA RECIPE

I love to spa it up most days and going to the spa every day is just not realistic. Bring it to your bathroom every day or at any time you need a pick me up!

1. Drink a mug of warm water and squeeze ½ -1 lemon. (add stevia if it’s too sour)
2. Dry body brushing to eliminate toxins. (purchase dry brush from a place like a co-op or amazon).
3. Drop a few drops of essential oils at the bottom of tub. I like to use lavender, rose , orange, or eucalyptus oil. As soon as the shower turns on, drop a few drops on the bottom of tub. Take in 10 deep breathes in and out. It will feel like you are in a steam room at a spa.
4. Use a body and face scrub. I also use a Korean hand mitt for body.
5. Before exiting shower, rub body oil all over your body. I use a coconut oil or shea butter with essential oils.
6. Upon exiting and while your face is still steamy, spritz your face with a facial mist. I love to use rose facial sprays. Amazon, spas, and co-ops have a lot of good choices.
7. Finish with the rest of your lotions and potions!! Grab some water with lemon and have a beautiful day.

8. Self-care. Make small changes every day– To make changes in your life start small. The biggest changes come from small steps. If having more time for yourself is what you have been wanting take out a few moments in your day and follow some of the above steps. If eating healthier is something you want. Instead of pulling out all the bad things out and making yourself crazy, maybe include a morning green smoothie every morning. Or add one green to every meal you have. It could be that you want to move your body more. Take a 10 minute longer walk with your dog, child, or just a walk by yourself. Try a new class if you like. Be kind to yourself and remember you are creating new changes for yourself. Change does not happen overnight and that’s ok. When you start to live a more inspired life a shift will start happening naturally.

These are few of my top tips on how to live an inspired life. Let your natural self-flow and shift your thoughts to self-love.  Go after what makes you happy and stay away from what brings you down.

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